


Color My World

by snapchattingnct



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, Soulmates AU, angst but with a happy ending, implied family troubles, implied past toxic relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-25 00:41:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22127182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snapchattingnct/pseuds/snapchattingnct
Summary: For @hyuckshot (markyhucks on twt).People walk around in a world of black and white until they meet their soulmates. The moment they find each other, their worlds shine with color.(In which Mark teaches Donghyuck how to love and how to be loved again).
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 18
Kudos: 245





	Color My World

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hyuckshot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyuckshot/gifts).



> Happy Birthday Angel! 
> 
> I hope that your special day was one filled with lots of good memories and being showered with love by the ones around you. 
> 
> I know that I didn't get to finish this little fic on time for your birthday but I hope that you enjoy it regardless. Per request, angst but with a happy ending for our markhyuck cuties. 
> 
> Big thank you to Isis, per usual, for being the best beta ever. (I will say this everytime and I will not apologize for how repetitive or annoying it is. Because she is that amazing~)

They found each other at the lowest point in Donghyuck’s entire life. 

His cheeks were stained with tears and his nose rubbed raw when they had bumped into each other in the streets. He was a walking empty shell without a soul at the time of their first meeting, so he hadn’t really noticed the change until the boy that bumped into him gasped out loud.

Donghyuck was set on continuing down the street as if the incident never happened but the stranger grasped onto his wrist tightly, pulling him to a stop. Out of pure reflex, Donghyuck flinched at the sudden contact and immediately yanked his arm out of the stranger’s hold, cowering in fear. He stared back at the stranger, eyes blown, and his heart beating rapidly in his chest. 

“Oh, I’m… sorry.” The boy had managed to stutter out, his eyes equally as wide. Hands raised up, he added, “I didn’t mean to scare you…”

Donghyuck had taken a step back in fear, his hands clenched at his sides, prepared to defend himself if needed. But when he saw that the stranger stood still in their spot, hands still raised up in a harmless manner, staring back at him with concern in their eyes, he slowly unclenched his hands. Then wiping at his wet cheeks hastily, he mumbled a quiet apology. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to react like that.”

“No, no. If anything, it was my fault that I acted the way I did and scared you.” The boy laughed, his warm voice enveloping Donghyuck’s entire body. It swirled and wrapped around his body like a comforting blanket. The sound of the boy’s laugh made Donghyuck breathe just a little easier. “I just couldn't let you get away. You felt what I felt right? When we bumped into each other? Are you seeing what I’m seeing? Because you have the most beautiful brown eyes ever.”

Donghyuck couldn’t help but frown, confusion maring his features. Did he just hear the boy correctly? Did he just say  _ brown?  _ As in the  _ color  _ brown?

As he allowed the boy’s words to sink in, Donghyuck began to realize that his world was no longer a stark black and white but rather a vibrant rainbow. Unable to stop himself, a gasp slipped past his lips as he took in the color in the world around him. It was so beautiful. 

The bleak, gloomy gray skies that he saw everyday were filled with fluffy white clouds scattered across a calm blue sky. The sun added depth to the blue skies with its golden hues, warming up everything beneath its rays. All around him, explosion of colors filled his vision, from luscious, green grass to blooming, yellow sunflowers.

But the most beautiful of them all was the stranger standing right in front of him with his messy ebony locks, golden circle frames, and rosy, pink lips. The stranger was dressed in nothing but a simple grey hoodie and joggers, but he looked so stunning. 

“Wow…,” Donghyuck breathed out as he continued to stare at the stranger, not feeling an ounce of embarrassment as he did so. 

“Yeah, huge  _ wow _ .” The boy continued to laugh and Donghyuck was sure he hadn't heard anything so melodic in his life. Drawn in by the boy’s charms, Donghyuck took a tentative step closer, lessening the distance between them just as the boy said, “I guess we’re soulmates.”

.

Ever since Mark had entered into his life, the older boy had showered him with an unbelievable amount of love. The amount of love that Mark gave him in a day was more than he had ever received in his entire life. 

It was different, but a good different. 

The only problem, or rather problems, was that he didn’t know how to react to it. Or how to reciprocate it back, actually. And that scared him more than anything. 

Each time Mark would reach for his hand, to hold it, Donghyuck would flinch away. He didn’t mean to, but his body simply acted on his own, a fight or flight reflex that became a hard habit for him to break. Mark would immediately back away, his cheeks flushed red, a soft apology on the tip of his tongue. Mark gave him his space in the beginning without a second thought, backing away each time that he thought that he moved too fast or made Donghyuck uncomfortable with his forwardness, which Donghyuck was so, so thankful for. 

It was only a matter of time before Mark would get tired of having to pull himself back or distance himself from his soulmate. Donghyuck knew this. But it didn’t make the pain any less when he saw Mark’s dejected face each time he tried to get close to him, only for Donghyuck to back away before he could do anything. 

Kisses shared between the two of them were a rarity. They’ve been together for more than half a year now, after discovering that they were each other’s soulmates. But they have yet to share a real, first kiss with one another. Sure there were gentle, fleeting forehead kisses from Mark’s end when the elder thought that Donghyuck was fast asleep. Those caught his breath and made his entire body burn, he loved them dearly. 

But each time he found himself staring a little more than necessary at Mark’s lips, completely memorized with them, and wanting to find out how they would feel against his, his past, toxic relationships would reel him back. Mark would always look at him with sad, confused eyes whenever he would pull back like that as if he was disgusted with the idea of kissing Mark, when that was far from the truth. Because for one, Mark wouldn’t hurt him.

Donghyuck knew that. But there was still something holding him back from loving Mark fully, deeply, and completely like he should. 

Instead of ending their relationship like any sane person would have done, Mark stuck even closer to him. Mark loved Donghyuck enough for the both of them. Whether or not Donghyuck returned it, it didn’t make Mark love him any less. 

Mark was there for him when he woke up and when he would fall asleep at night. He was there to make sure Donghyuck ate his whole three meals each day, sometimes trying to cook him something even when he couldn’t boil a pot of water to save his life. But he still tried, and that’s all that really mattered. 

He was there to remind Donghyuck to take a break from his work or to give him comfort when life got too much for him. He was there to help him forget about all the bad things in life. He was there to make silly jokes and puns, or to become a big fool if it meant that it would put a smile on Donghyuck’s lips. Mark was there for him, every step of the way. 

And this made Donghyuck so,  _ so  _ frustrated when he couldn’t give Mark anything in return. 

Mark was always the first to give. Mark was the first to reach out and try to hold his hand when they had spent their first date at the park. Mark was the first to kiss him on the forehead at night before he went to sleep or when he would leave early in the morning for work. Mark was the first to say ‘I love you.’ Mark was the first to give Donghyuck his heart entirely. 

.

Mark had bid him goodbye that day with a tight smile on his lips. 

His parents had called for him the night before, ordering him to come home for dinner and as much as Mark had protested against it at his side, Donghyuck obediently replied, telling them that he would be there. 

After finding out about his home life, Mark hated talking about his family, even more than he did. Mark refused to allow him to come back to that cursed place ever again. Which was why the moment he found out, he all but made Donghyuck move in with him. Donghyuck had moved in with him without a second thought. He’s been dreaming of the day where he would be free from the clutches of his parents. 

“Do you really have to go, Hyuck?” Mark asked a he gnawed onto his bottom lip, his nervousness showing in his eyes. “You know that I don’t like it when you spend time with  _ them _ .”

“I know you don’t.” Donghyuck whispered back. “But, it’s not like it’s an option. You know what they’re capable of.”

“And that’s what scares me!”

“I’ll be okay, I promise.”

Except he wasn’t. 

He never was when he paid a visit home. 

Donghyuck was so occupied with his thoughts that he hadn’t noticed that the light had turned red and he didn’t have the right of way anymore. His mind was so muddled with what had happened at home, that he didn’t realize that multiple cars were blaring their horns at him as he stepped onto the crosswalk. It was only when a warm hand wrapped themselves around his arm, yanking him back into their chest as they called out his name in such a  _ desperate  _ manner that he came back to his senses. 

“Oh, my fucking god. Donghyuck, what are you thinking?” Mark shouted, his words deafening even against the pouring rain. “You could have fucking died, Donghyuck, is that what you want?” 

Mark had never ever raised his voice like this at Donghyuck, so he was nothing but a frozen statue in Mark’s arms, lips parted in shock. He was so taken aback that his body couldn’t even act out of reflex to pull back, to run away like he normally would. 

The fear that shone within Mark’s eyes left him speechless. 

With a sigh, Mark pulled him flushed against his body, holding him as close as humanly possible. Then he whispered, his voice cracking as he spoke, “You have no idea how much it scared me when my entire world turned back to black and white for a second, Donghyuck. I… thought that I had lost you. I thought that  _ they  _ had done something to you… Or that you just gave up entirely… ”

That was the thing about soulmates. People walk around in a world of black and white until they meet their soulmates. The moment they find each other, their worlds shine with color. But when their soulmates dies, their entire world loses its color again. It was a cruel thing to experience but it was just how soulmates worked. 

Clutching onto the back of Mark’s soaked hoodie, Donghyuck said through chattering teeth, “I know that I’m terrible at being your soulmate, but I would never do something like that to you, Mark.” 

“I know you wouldn’t. It’s just with how you’ve been acting lately, it’s hard not to come to that conclusion. You’re so much more distant than you usually are, and I know you’ve been visiting those goddamn parents of yours, so I couldn’t help but think the worst when everything lost its colors.” 

“I know I can’t promise a lot of things,” Donghyuck began, “but I can promise you that I would never,  _ ever  _ leave you like that.”

.

After reassuring each other that they were okay and that everything was going to be okay, they were both soaked to the core, shaking like leaves in the rain. Mark called them a cab back home because there was no way in hell that the both of them were going to make it spending another second in the freezing, cold rain. The entire ride home was quiet. Neither one of them talked. Instead they found comfort in each other's warm hands, listening to the sound of the cab’s windshield wipers clearing the rain. 

As the cab stopped in front of their apartment complex, Mark paid for their fare before pulling Donghyuck out with him. Neither of them had mind the stares that they got as they climbed the stairs to their floor, looking like two wet dogs. Once they were both in the safety and comfort of their own home, Mark spoke out, “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up, babe.”

Donghyuck nodded and allowed him to take him to their bathroom. Mark left for a second though to change out of his wet clothes and to bring Donghyuck a set of new ones. After they had both changed, Mark pointed to his hair, saying, “Did you have a food fight? You have chunks of rice in your hair, babe.”

At the mention of his hair, Donghyuck hands flew up to touch it. And true to his words, there were chunks of food in his hair, which reminded him of why he had rushed out of his childhood kitchen so fast and into the pouring rain in the first place. Squeezing his eyes shut, he tried his best to erase all of those terrible memories from his mind. The loud shouts, the sound of crashing dishes, the feeling of hands tugging and pulling at him. 

Choking on air, Donghyuck tried to explain himself, but no words came out. 

Immediately he felt Mark’s gentle hands covering over his own. With a soft tone that Donghyuck knew that only Mark was capable of, he listened as the older boy tried to coax him out. 

“Hey, Donghyuck, it’s just me. I’m sorry that I brought it up.” Mark whispered, his words barely audible. “Hey, look at me. I got you, okay? I got you.”

It took him a minute to recompose himself, then another to come back to reality. And when he did, he all but slumped into Mark’s hold, wanting nothing more than to feel Mark’s strong arms around him, protecting him yet again from all the bad things in the world. 

He wasn’t sure how it had happened but it was all a blur to him. Because the next thing he knew, Mark was massaging his scalp as he lathered the shampoo up in his hair. 

Mark’s fingers moved with the utmost care as they threaded through his locks, untangling them and getting rid of all the food fragments. As Mark did this, he would lean down and pepper his face with light kisses. And for the first time, Donghyuck didn’t turn away. Instead he accepted them with a warm, light heart. 

It seemed like today was a first for a lot of things. 

“I know that I’m not exactly the easiest soulmate to have,” Donghyuck started, his voice meek. Then licking his lips, he cleared his throat before adding, “But thank you for sticking around, Mark.”

“Of course.” Mark smiled down at him, his eyes shining brightly. “That’s what soulmates and boyfriends are supposed to do, right?”

“I know that I’m really bad at expressing myself, but I will try even harder to show how much you mean to me.” Donghyuck promised. 

“I’m okay with just the way you are, right now, Hyuck. You don’t have to change anything.”

“But I want to, for you, Mark. You deserve it.”

“Just because you don’t express your affection as much doesn’t mean that you love me any less.”

Love. 

Oh, how Donghyuck loved Mark. 

He loved Mark more than anything else in the world. No, he loved Mark more than anything else in the entire universe. He loved Mark as if he was the sole reason for his existence in this life. He loved Mark as if his life depended on it. He loved Mark in ways that were unexplainable. 

Mark had always told him that he was the sun, giving light to his dull life, coloring it brightly. 

But what Mark didn’t know was that he was the moon in Donghyuck’s life, giving him light even in the darkest of nights, guiding him. 

If Donghyuck was the sun, Mark was the moon. 

The moon only shone by using the sun’s light, and the sun would never ask for anything in return. 

  
Except in his case, Donghyuck asked for so much in return. He asked and took more than he could give. Mark always told him that he didn’t mind. But it did matter. Because what was he going to do when he took too much, got too selfish, and left Mark with nothing at all? 

Seeing Donghyuck’s troubled expression, Mark couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle, earning him a small whine from the boy. Then tucking a lock of hair behind Donghyuck’s ear, he said, “How about we both meet halfway? A relationship works in both ways. It can’t just be me giving all the love or you giving all the love. We have to both give a little.”

“What are you suggesting?”

“I like to say ‘ _ I love you’  _ every chance I get, right?” Mark asked. 

Donghyuck nodded his head. 

“But you find it hard to say it back, right? It’s because you’re just not used to it.”

Donghyuck nodded his head again. 

“Then how about this,” Mark reached out and grasped his hand tightly, giving it three gentle squeezes. “Whenever you want to tell me that you love me, just hold my hand and give it three squeezes. When I was young, my parents did this to me all the time. This was their version of ‘ _ I love you’  _ when they couldn’t say it to me out loud.”

“Three squeezes?”

Mark nodded, as he gave Donghyuck’s hand another three squeezes. “Three of anything really. It can be a squeeze or a tap, whatever is easiest for you, babe. It’ll be our signal from now on, okay?”

Instead of giving him a reply, Donghyuck simply squeezed his hand three times, a grace of a smile on his lips. 

.

Since Mark had introduced it to him, Donghyuck is saying  _ ‘I love you’  _ all the time now. 

Whenever they held hands, Donghyuck always made sure to squeeze it three times. But he did it even randomly now. Three taps on Mark’s hand, on his shoulder, or on his knee. It didn't matter, whatever body part of Mark was closest to him, Donghyuck made sure to say it. 

Then they were more than a year into their relationship and Donghyuck’s new favorite spot to relay his love for Mark was three taps on the ass. The first time that he had done this, the look that Mark made had him clutching his stomach, bending over in laughter. It was priceless. Because of this, he made sure to do it at that particular spot more often. 

Donghyuck said  _ ‘I love you’  _ more than often than Mark had ever said it verbally. 

It became an ingrained signal of theirs. Mark could tap him three times anywhere on his body and he would get three taps back from Donghyuck, even in his sleep. And that, Donghyuck thought, spoke volumes for how much he had changed and how much he loved Mark. 

He wasn’t incapable of love, in giving it or receiving it. He just had his own way of expressing it. People say things differently, even soulmates. 

Donghyuck just needed someone to show him how.

**Author's Note:**

> [twt](https://twitter.com/snapchattingnct/status/1171284194196111360?s=20) | [cc](https://curiouscat.me/snapchattingnct)


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